Or Why I Need To Get Away From the HellHole Town
I want to shake the dust off of my feet, and make something of myself. I want bright lights, and big cities.But how can i ever get that if i can barely function in this stupid school in this crappy little town. Sigh. Maybe i can function cuz i desire bigger and greater things. I worry myself sick because i just want so badly. I feel like my charchter in Calamity last year. Or belle. I guess thats why my favorite disney movie is beauty and the beast. I always felt like she did, "there must be more than this provincial life" Why can't i find it? Will i ever make it? Is it stupid for me to think that i could ever act my way out of amanda?
To make matters worse Josh is coming back. I don't want to see him, I want him to stay in Georgia and rot in it. His school does have an awesome drama department though. Gah it was amazing, I almost moved down there with him just to be apart of it. He has his art and i hate him for it. So talented, and in art its so easy to see...it'll take him wherever he pleases, it's not fair. And Brandon has his music. He's so good at trombone. But me..what about me? I want to act in front of thousands of people but how can i get there on what i have? I'm doing a monologue for the arts festival but i can't find which one. I was told to do one of the Vagina Monologues, but sadly there all about....well, vaginas and Mr. Saxton would pass out if i ever did one of them. Even though for some reason i think there very good monologues.
Well that's enough of that. I'm almost tempted to disable comments cuz i don't feel like listening to people. But oh well. Enough incoherent babbling for today.