I'll never find it in me,
To love me like he does,
I'll never find it in me,
To actually believe that I am beautiful,
I'll never find it in me,
To stop fading away,
I can't scream,
I can't hurt anyone's feelings
I want to offend,
I want to defend,
Never again,
I'm not allowed to hurt,
I'm not allowed to cry,
I'm not allowed to hate,
Fear won't let go of my heart,
Its ripping me,
It's tearing me apart,
Jealousy rotts my heart away,
I hate them,
But I love them,
No one feels this way,
Like there stuck inside a body,
That five sizes to small,
And you want out,
Tearing to get out,
I look in the mirror,
And try my hardest not to hate God.
Try not to hate Him
But in my heart I'm screaming at Him,
For making me this way.
I ask Him if He was just pissed off when He decided this for me,
Or looking for a good time.